Another chance to go to prom…

Once upon a time this 30-year-old woman was 17. And she went to prom.

Not just went. I was determined to find a date. Many of my friends were going stag but at the tender age of 17, I was convinced that was NOT the way to go. I thought I just had to have a date. I knew this cute guy who was a grade under me but we were cool and had crushes on each other so I asked him.

However, this would prove to be a mistake of the grandest proportions.

Learn more about yourself through a pen…

(click the pic)

So you know I’m not a fan of Valentine’s Day but I did do something kind of fun at work. We did a video showing how you can find the right guy through handwriting analysis. A contributor and friend came along with me. It was interesting to say the least. Let’s just say the stuff that was really good, didn’t make it to the video for obvious reasons…

It’s long distance: Where is it going?

I’ve had a bit of luck on eHarmony, surprisingly enough. The catch? I’m chatting up a few folks that are nowhere near where I live. My question is, where does such a thing start heading? I’ve never really been in this situation. Does this mean if we fall in love and then figure out who moves where, only to have it not last long enough to even finish out an apartment lease? I guess it’s good just to have someone to talk to, right? But what if more develops.

My best friend is currently seriously involved with a guy in the U.K. And it turns out he may even live here in the states after he visits her in April. I’m happy for her but I’m worried too — where is such a leap headed? In her case she is on a more committed route whereas I’m just chit-chatting with a few nice chaps. She has a son involved. I’ve got an ornery cat.

The weirdness of eHarmony is you either draw out a big net or a tiny one. If you do the latter, you aren’t going to dig up many fish. But if you send out a massive net, meaning you selected on your profile that distance doesn’t matter, you have more opportunity to score, so to speak. The main goal being a real relationship, I would assume, however achieving that is already difficult. If you compound that with distance then you have even more a dilemma.

I know I’m using a lot of fishing/water references lately but here’s another one: I’m just going to hang out on the dock and see what happens. Wait. That didn’t come out right…

Get out the dinghy

I recently received an email from a very old friend. We were quite the pair in middle school and high school. Now she’s married, a teacher and has two beautiful girls. One of which was the topic of her email. Her youngest is in a cutest baby contest hosted by a photographer in the area and she wanted everyone to vote. The picture is adorable — her little girl is dressed in pink feathers and wearing a sweet smile. This friend of mine is one of many who have “taken the plunge” while I’m pretty much coasting, drifting and kind of drowning!

I don’t really have that itch. You know the one. That baby itch everyone tells me I’m going to get or should already be getting now that I’m 30. I love kids but I’m not just dying to have one, which is a good thing since I’m thinking I’ve got to kind of land a real relationship first! In fact, I’m OK with not having one. But when I get these emails, you know the ones — a slideshow of what so and so’s kids did adorably on camera, the trip the family took to the nearest amusement park— that’s when I let out a dreamy sigh. I’m happy for them all but I wonder what they must think of me. Do they think my life not as fulfilled since I’ve made the decision not to have a family? Do they silently “tisk, tisk” me as I go yet another year unwed? Bottom line: I don’t really care but will admit I wonder what they think.

My speed-dating experience…CAUGHT ON CAMERA!

So as promised, here is the link to my speed-dating video.

The ridiculousness irony of speed-dating: You have nearly five minutes to make a connection with a stranger but SOOO much can come out of that little time. It’s genius really. But kind of tough too.

Last week Hurry Date was a real gem and let me check out the art that is speed-dating at Lower Greenville’s Stout. I met up with some great guys. They seemed to dig me…

But as is the world of dating, when I took my little scorecard home of my “yes” and “no” matches to plug into the Hurry Date online matching system, only three matched equally with me. I suppose that’s not bad considering that I kind of said yes to most of the guys just to throw my coin in the “eh, you never know” fountain. I’ve contacted one. Haven’t really heard from him yet. Maybe it’s because he didn’t like my wrinkled dress. But it’s early still. I’ll keep you posted.One thing is for sure though. There is no accounting for taste in the jungle that is finding a mate. While taking a little restroom break after my dates, I heard other female daters responses. Let’s just say they weren’t going home with a scorecard full of little circles around their “Y” responses. As me and the team’s assistant editor left the speed-dating establishment, it was those same girls chatting it up with some really unaware guys!Got any ideas for me to survive Valentine’s Day??

Dating — on speed

What does a video camera, a guy who doesn’t know about chemistry and Kermit the Frog have in common? They were all part of my exciting speed dating experiment last night at Stout on Lower Greenville in Dallas — courtesy of Hurry Date.

I walked into the bar a little apprehensive but curious. My ssistant editor came out with me to document my speed-dating process. Which was pretty funny considering that while we were waiting for everything to start, about two random Hurry-Daters came over and hit on her big time. Let’s just say she wasn’t all that flattered. She quickly switched one of her rings from the right hand to the left ring-finger to ward off any evil spirits…

When the time came that I got to sit down with these guys, one guy in particular stood out like a sore thumb. He was also one of the guys eyeing Aly like fresh meat on a slab from a far. I won’t go into detail but he was, well, let’s just say interesting. When he asked me what I looked for right away in a connection with a guy, I said something along the lines of “chemistry.”

“What really is chemistry, anyway?” He seemed to ask in a possibly innocent attempt to sound prolific. Hum…I’ll just leave it at that…

During this process everyone is marked with a number they put on their name tags. And you also have a “scorecard.” This is basically where you check “Y” for yes and “N” for no in accordance to the numbers. And during this process of getting to know these guys in all of nearly five-minutes a piece, I start to lose my already failing voice. I must have sounded like across between Kathleen Turner and Kermit the Frog…

At the end of the night, I took my little scorecard and filled out all my “yes” and “no” responses to each guy on Hurry Date’s matching system. You have to wait 24 hours to see who also said yes to you. Seven hours and counting…

I would get into more detail here, but you will just have to wait until the “results show” as they say in reality television lingo and stay tuned to the upcoming video of this loveless “Eligible Editor.”

*insert pity-party inspired long, drawn out sigh here*

Ah, I can just smell the humiliation…

In two short hours I will be on several speed dates. I can thank the folks over at Hurry Date for this opportunity. Because in my line of work self-deprecation means good ratings, we are going to shoot video of my experience in a very tongue-in-cheek and hopefully entertaining way. Stay tuned over the coming days and I’ll post the link here. In the meantime though, since this will be a “documentary” (more like my own mockumentary), I really hope that the guys I will be chatting with won’t feel like it’s all a game. Because you know, in the end, I wouldn’t mind if someone slipped me their business card…and MEAN it. *glances over at stack of useless business cards from strange men*

My trust meter is broken

After all my efforts with actually trying to land a mate, wouldn’t it just be such a shame for me to lose an opportunity because I’m afraid to trust the motives of someone interested? That’s where I am today.

I have no idea how to fall into something with possibilities and just, well, BE. I seem to find myself wondering, second-guessing, and anticipating the shoe to drop. Depending on your beliefs, we technically only have one physical life. I don’t want to live it never trusting again.
It really isn’t the bitterness of past failed serious relationships that is my problem anymore. There was most assuredly a time when I didn’t necessarily hate men, but more to the point — I tried very hard to keep a thinly veiled guard up. I was always waiting for when they would hurt me. For five years I just stopped believing.

Now the issue here is trusting if whether or not advances, interests and a man’s attention are genuine. I believe it’s an enormous waste of effort, time and yes, even money, if in the end I sabotage things before they have begun! I don’t fear commitment for what it implies. I just fear the possibility of a let-down. More to the point — a devastation. Jumping in with both feet and eyes semi-closed is new to me. I think the girl, that girl in her early 20s, was quite good at that. Too good. And now that she has reached nearly 30, putting her big toe in the water is how she would rather start.

But that isn’t entirely true. Online dating to me is a risk. Joining groups of people you have never met is a risk. Even striking up a conversation with a stranger is a risk. Those are all things I’ve done in the past month. Maybe not a big deal. But to me it’s bigger than what I had been doing for the past year I just obessessed about work and getting me together. To me that’s a full plunge.

However why is it that I’ve dived in full on, but can’t mentally get past dipping my big toe in the uncharted waters of an actual possibility?

eHarmony scam…ooops I mean spam!

So I don’t really want to make this blog mainly about my online dating woes. But today eHarmony has given me much to write about. Hopefully by next week I will have a lot more stories of actually meeting REAL people.

Check this profile out. Remember that some of those answers below are predetermined after you take the personality test. The parts about what you are thankful for and what you do on your leisure time are write-ins. Doesn’t this just sniff of spam? Either I’m being spammed with bogus matches to make me feel like I’m all “popular” or someone has hacked eHarmony’s system. Either way, those 29 or so dimensions really seem like a memory…

The guy’s name is BC. Yea. Right…

The one thing bc is most passionate about:

• awesome

The three things which bc is most thankful for:

• apples
• trees
• life

bc’s friends describe him as:

• Ambitious
• Intelligent
• Easy-Going
• Good Listener

Three of bc’s best life-skills are:

• Creating a peaceful, beautiful home environment
• Long-term personal planning
• Achieving personal goals

bc typically spends his leisure time:

• sweet

Meeting new people can sometimes take risks…

This will be a quick update.

I’ve never done the whole “meetup” thing before. It always seemed kind of risky just to join a group of folks you have never met and then join them in events. But I’m quite glad I did. Last night’s pajama party was a blast. Not many guys though. And the one everyone was drooling over had his eyes on one girl in particular. 

I didn’t wear pjs. I donned sweats and my favorite Mavericks T-shirt from a recent game. I now have a nickname from it. I think I like Maverick better than my childhood nickname of Squeaky… Overall: Best $17 I’ve ever spent — had to bring some libations.

So Larry, a frequent reader here, asked for photos…

I don’t think so sir! You will just have to believe, but really, it wasn’t as risque as it sounded. Except for the question game which included a very naughty question from me that asked, “What can you do with silly string?” Ahaha. 

Anyway, no one was half nude.